***
“Throw it in the bag…” she sings on the way to school. Her brother shakes his head at her; she knows that he is secretly wishing his sister would “put a sock in it” before he’d have to do that himself. Making gestures with her hands and mouthing her lips to the song, Crystal finds happiness somehow, meanwhile still pondering the reason why she is awake so early. What an exciting moment in the day. Every second she realizes her mind is racing with thoughts- what if I never went to school? I have a car and money. Could I just keep going to wherever I wanted? Oh, no. If my parents found out…***
It is now English class and Crystal sits there wondering, “How do these people come up with ideas so fast? How do they understand what the text is really saying? I don’t understand. Is there something wrong with me?” Her father always did have this conversation with her- that not everyone thinks alike. He said that Crystal wasn’t entirely an analytical thinker, rather an “artistic, free-willed thinker.” Although this seems like a good excuse as to why she doesn’t think like the others, there seems to always be another thing that is stopping her from feeling normal. She just sometimes feels like she doesn’t fit in. And, it’s hard for her. She has always felt separated from this school. Although she has her own group of friends, she feels like their opinions, their fashion interests, their ways of thinking don’t pair up to those of the rest of the school. “Why am I here?” Crystal asks herself, still unfortunately not having come up with an answer. Maybe a couple more sneezes, a couple more songs, and a couple more English classes may do the trick. If not, then there’s always magic, right? (612)
Ashleigh, you do a good job creating a character who doesn't quite feel at home in her own environment. Whether because her feet or allergies aren't right, because she doesn't quite think the same ways as others, or jsut because she wants to get in her car and keep going, you communicate quite well Crystal's wish for a magical transformation. Nicely done.
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